Hoping For A Better Week!

Poor Brenda.  I’ve talked to her a couple of times and dropped off some goodies (soup and muffins) ……you still have to eat right?  It’s all freezer stuff because I’m pretty sure she’s gotten food from others too….why do we think food makes things better?    I feel so bad for her right now.  She’s just in shock…..it all happened so quickly.  Thursday he was fine, Saturday he was gone…..how do you process that mentally??

Not sure what is worse…..watching someone deteriorate over a few years, knowing that the inevitable was going to happen BUT not when…..that black cloud that hangs over your head day and night…when it is going to burst and pour all over you???  Or having a normal day, enjoying life doing what you always do and then wham……..in minutes that all changes so drastically.  Does your mind and body deal with the stress any differently…..everyone deals with it their own way but is it harder?  I don’t know.

All this just brings back those memories from that day….it opens a wound that had finally started to heal.

I told her to call me……to talk, to listen, to do whatever but when she’s wants too.  I know that everything is so overwhelming those first few days.  You want to talk but you don’t…..you relive everything over and over again but then you get to a point where you just want it all to stop….you don’t want to talk about it, you don’t want to think about it…you want it all and everyone to just go away.

The weather is better today…..we’re seeing some blue sky here and there.  I need that today…..it just helps me feel better.

It’s babysitting day so I’m off to tackle the entry way at their place……heavy duty coat hooks in hand!!

L.

 

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