It’s beautiful out this morning……coffee on the deck. Nice days like this are really uplifting…..the sun makes me feel so much better and much less griev-ie.

I’m babysitting the grandkids this afternoon for the first time since THAT day. They’re usually at our house at least once a week for visits …..we’re very lucky we see them a lot. Babysitting is really fun though…without Mom and Dad here they can do anything they want, just about! Today we’re going to plant the herb garden…..they like helping with things like that. We’ll be busy, so that’s good.

But…….I’m a little afraid that watching them today will make me think about Ken missing this. Will they remember anything about Grandpa?

I know Karter will ask where Grandpa is…..he always checks the recliner when he comes in the door…. that’s the first place he goes. It’s hard to explain to him because he just doesn’t understand yet, he’s only 3. Cadence knows though. She’s 5.

I was 10 when my grandpa died and I don’t really remember much about him at all. I remember that he was bald and always wore a hat when he went out, but that’s it. I see pictures so I know we played outside, went on picnics and things like that……..but I don’t remember actually doing any of those things with him.

We have one of those digital picture things, the kids like looking at that. All the pics on it are of them….I keep adding new ones as they get older. They like to see themselves when they were little babies….I’ll have to make sure that I add more with Grandpa in them. Maybe just some of Grandpa! Kallie, who’s just one year old definitely won’t remember him but maybe, once she’s a little older, if she sees a picture she’ll ask.

The 3 and 5 year old remember him for now of course, but in a few years, as they get older I don’t think they will. I don’t know how to make sure they do…..I don’t know if that’s even possible.

That makes me very sad. He loved those babies so much.

But, that is life, I guess!



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